Thoughts on Far Cry Primal – Part 1

At last! A new game from 2016 that I can write about over the course of a few weeks that doesn’t devour all my free time like X-COM 2 (Which is still just great). Yes, Far Cry Primal is out, finally giving all us comfortable couch potatoes the chance to hunter and gather are way around vast, unspoiled lands that are filled to the brim with homicide cave men and killing machines of various different species. So what do I think of FCP then? Well after a few hours in the game I’m ready to give some first impressions on the game and a few quirks I’ve found with it.

I Don’t give a shit about the story – *Gasp* In 10000 BCE people didn’t speak English, this is a widely accepted fact. Now I do from time to time watch foreign language films such as Old Boy, The Raid 1&2, Battle Royale (Really any film with Asain people murdering one another) and I diligently read the subtitles to try and understand the film, what can I say I’m just odd like that. But in a game that where every character is speaking what I’m going to politely call “Gibberish” I just don’t have the patience to read a series of subtitles all telling me to “Go murder that other bloke for his stuff”. So yeah I’m skipping most of the story cutscenes, please tell me if I’m missing the caveman version of Othello would you?

Damn is this game pretty – I should have taken a few screen shots to prove my point but my word is this game gorgeous on the PS4. I’m sure it’s lovely on the Xbox as well and on the PC, it will actually perform fellatio on the user at higher settings but yeah it’s pretty.

I AM THE BEASTMASTER – I can ride a sodding Sabertooth Tiger into battle. GAME OF THE YEAR – Also I can set an owl to attack people – GAME OF THE DECADE- and the owl can drop bombs filled with Bees – GAME OF THE CENTURY!

What’s so special about Northern Wood? – Ok, like the other Far Cry games, Primal has a bugger ton of crafting and gathering for the player to perform and it all involves finding the correct leather pelts for particular items. Please inform me how the skins of a deer and tapir differ in such a way to make one usable for crafting a bag of meat while the other is useless? Please do tell.

So yeah, I like Far Cry Primal, now I’m off to play some more and make friends with more murderous killing machines.


About PropeRob

All round song and dance man with penchant for quoting Jeeves and Wooster and Toberlone's. Known to drone on about Video Games and geeky bollocks to anyone who can't escape in time.

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